The Scraundler

Hypnotherapists, eh!

2010-04-25T17:44:00.001-07:00

Arthurian Legend

2009-05-05T09:58:00.001-07:00

Arthurian legend has it that King Arthur was a great warrior king, protecting England from both mortal and supernatural enemies.

Sadly, this is indeed just legend!

In actual fact, Arthur was considered a feeble minded, eccentric old buffoon by those around him. He was usually an object of ridicule due to the fanciful nature of some of his ideas and stories.
Arthur's Round Table is one such story that has entered the annals of fable.

The truth of the story is a little more prosaic.

He had spent over two months attempting to fashion a wooden table for his eating needs. Unfortunately, his carpentry skills were found wanting and he eventually gave up on the idea of a traditionally styled table.

Instead, he simply sawed a 6 inch thick slice from the bole of a large oak tree, hammered four legs onto the round(ish) slice and set it up as his main eating area.

The width of this slice of oak was only three feet, thus rendering it useless for all but the sparsest of dinner parties or meetings.

For those that like to think of The Holy Grail as a goblet used at The Last Supper, it must be noted that, had the Grail ever found it's way into the possession of Arthur Pendragon and sat upon his table, there wouldn't have been enough room left for him to even put his elbows on this piece of fabled furniture.

Irony

2009-05-05T08:26:00.001-07:00

I guess everyone has seen Diarmud Gavin advertising Morrisons supermarkets.

This quote from the ad, as he is wheeling a shopping trolley up Gold Hill at Shaftesbury (The setting of the Hovis ad), struck me as particularly ironic.

"I like bakers better when they're trained.
When they can make dough from scratch - not just heat it up.
And bake different types of bread, fresh, on the premises.
There was a time when you could get that on almost every street."

Yes, and why isn't there a baker in every street anymore?
Could it have anything to do with the destruction of such businesses by the supermarkets?

The following was from a report in 1995! What are the figures like now?

There are now only 3,500 family bakeries left in Britain. In the past five years, 1,500 have closed. Fifty years ago, small bakeries produced 83 per cent of British bread. Today, with the advent of the sliced loaf and the supermarket bakery, they sell only 8 per cent.

Some colourising I did in Photoshop

2009-04-14T00:20:00.000-07:00

Migrant Mother - Dorothea Lange 1936

After:

Before:

Mr Gogh has a job interview today.

2009-04-13T11:34:00.000-07:00

Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance.

2009-04-13T04:37:00.000-07:00

Little is known of van Gogh's 'Colgate Period'

2009-04-12T17:01:00.000-07:00

Some see face painting as a vocation.

2009-04-12T16:57:00.000-07:00

The nanny state is at it again.

2009-04-12T16:54:00.000-07:00

The film makers just didn't get it!

2009-04-12T16:50:00.000-07:00

Abe Lincoln and his unfeasibly large hat

2009-04-11T16:26:00.000-07:00

A rare photograph of Abraham Lincoln arriving at a meeting of The Virginia Extreme Hat Club in 1860.
The start of the civil war in the following year meant that Mr Lincoln had to relinquish his membership of the club when hat heights were capped at 1ft 6in.

UK enter the Space Race

2009-04-11T15:49:00.000-07:00

The United Kingdom today entered the space race by launching a UK franchised version of the space shuttle that was piggybacking the first British built space station.

The station is equipped with 4 berths and a chemical lav.

The plastic and balsawood construction means that it will weigh less than nothing in outer space conditions.

The first UK chavnauts will spend the first day of their mission orbiting the earth very slowly, causing maximum frustration to other satellites and spacecraft during their overtaking phase.

On the second day of the mission, a spacewalk will be required to erect a special awning on the outer shell of the space station. "The Awning Of The Age Of Aquarius" will be erected at approximately 13:00 GMT and a number of experiments will be performed. These experiments are thought to involve the contents of the chemical toilet and a boules set.

1980's SatNav

2009-04-11T15:43:00.000-07:00

The Slalom On The Mount.

2009-04-11T15:18:00.001-07:00

Not everyone is a candidate for glasses.

2009-04-11T15:14:00.000-07:00

Oh dear.

That George Harrison was a card.

2009-04-11T15:07:00.000-07:00

George... always messing about!

Clouds

2009-04-11T09:10:00.001-07:00

Spotted any good cloud formations lately?

Picasso

2009-04-11T09:07:00.000-07:00

Picasso once tried his hand at street art, but he had to wait a long time before a subject came along that was sympathetic to his style.

Amplifier rank

2009-04-11T09:04:00.001-07:00

Your average guitar amplifier needs an easy to understand ranking system. I have devised a perfectly serviceable one here.

Walkers Crisps - What's the deal?

2009-04-11T08:56:00.000-07:00

Did Walkers REALLY swap the colours of their 'Salt and Vinegar' and 'Cheese and Onion' crisps?
Maybe they need this handy colour blindness checker.